Toxic employee makes coworkers cry and rolls her eyes during meetings, manager can't fire her because she hits 150% of her targets: 'She says [her coworkers] are too sensitive.'

1 week ago 6

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  • Aggressive looking businesswoman with curly blonde hair indoors in office during the daytime

    Top-performer stares down her coworker, who is not doing the same level of work as she is. 

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Some top performers are unpleasant to be around, not because they won't have a water cooler chat. They're unpleasant to be around because they think they're better than everyone else. Anyone who is constantly trying to be better than their coworkers and freaks out whenever their coworkers do better than them needs to work on themselves. It's good for the company when employees are a little competitive with each other. Still, if one employee thinks they are on a pedestal they can never descend from, it leads to antisocial behavior that's bad for workplace morale. 

  • I am managing a toxic high performer who hits 150% of targets. How do I protect my team without losing the numbers?

    I am a team lead for a group of 7 in a marketing agency. One of my direct reports let's call her Sarah is a superstar. She consistently hits 150% of her targets.

  • Her work is clean and she never misses a deadline. But Sarah is also r de to almost everyone else on the team. She interrupts people in meetings. She rolls her eyes when others ask questions.

  • She has made two junior staff cry in the past month with her comments. I have had three one on one conversations with her about this. Each time she says "I am just direct" or "maybe they are too sensitive". Last week I got

  • an anonymous complaint from the team saying they would rather lose her high output than deal with the environment she creates. I talked to my own manager. He said Sarah is too valuable to fire and that I need to find a way to

  • "manage her personality". I am stuck. If I do nothing the team morale will keep dropping and people might quit. If I push harder Sarah might leave or her performance might drop.

  • Has anyone dealt with a high performer who is toxic? Do I protect the team or protect the numbers?

  • Early-Light-864 What is the purpose of the meetings? Does she really need to be there? Creating separation to the extent it's reasonable based on business needs, seems like it could help

  • SquirrelLogicFan OP that's actually something i've been thinking about, she probably doesn't need to be in every meeting and that might reduce some of the tension

  • skt2k21 If her work is individual contributor work, maybe silo her and let her shine. If being a siloed IC is a bottleneck to progression, tell her she's great at her current level, the next level requires building her interpersonal efficacy, and if that's something she wants to work on, you or someone else can coach her. If it's not a barrier to her growth or if she doesn't want to do it, that's fine.

  • Ok-Set-5730 This is the answer. I commented outside of this thread, but I used to be a toxic high performer. We mostly respond to scenarios where our own growth may be stunted unless we get it together. She needs to understand that unless she can play nicely with others, she will never move into leadership. She's direct - be direct back.

  • Grantmepm I agree. I know somebody like Sarah who has very little patience with people who are idiots (and her team is half full of those). Thing is, she is also happy with not progressing, especially not managing people who she think are idiots. She just wants to be allowed to do the best she can, with what generates the best results in the 8 hours she has at work.

  • SaltSync I can speak from experience having been "Sarah" before.. the frustration's bubble up and are taken out on team members that aren't at fault. I am a very direct and unfiltered person that knows I am ana_h_le without intentionally trying to be. The best solution was to silo my workload and only attend absolutely mandatory meetings. Everyone including me was happier.

  • Intelligent-Farm-861 I was in the same boat. Outperformed everyone else but I couldn't hide my lack of patience towards them, which in fairness was a lack of maturity on my part. It was always understood my manager gave me an extra long leash so eventually I just left midway through meetings once I knew there was no need for me to be there.

  • Edomni Anyway that you can separate Sarah from the others? Let her run her own ship to a degree while you manage her specifically? Man this reminds me of an opposite story I read, where the individual was technically very bad at their job, but was otherwise the best person to hang around with and always brought the teams morale up. They didn't fire the individual because soft skills are harder to train than hard skills and their personality had a value no one else could bring to the team.

  • HC3883 The sad thing is that your low-technical performer but high-morale, strong, soft-skills person might make a good leader/manager, but is often passed over b/c they don't make numbers. Whereas the "Sarahs" of the world are often promoted into management roles and make everyone's lives a living h

  • ikonoklastic I can only speak personally, but I've seen more examples of lazy but fun-to-grab-a-b bosses tank a whole department. -with

  • Man in suit slumped in office chair with head back

    The lazy boss sits back in his chair, not caring that his department is nowhere near where it should be.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • aevz That does su when it happens. But the type of person who outperforms others by also using demoralization (that isn't warranted but is more an attempt at trying to push this narrative that they're the greatest and everyone ) can also tank a department, even with else su competent and capable people.

  • I can say this because I've witnessed the environment with their presence and without. And without was fine, and dare I say, even better, because all the work still got done to the same degree, but just without toxicity that everyone. stores up in their bodies and carries with them as baggage to all their other relationships and then spread to others. Either way, both types su and can do some serious damage lol.

  • Prestigious_Swan_584 "In toxic cultures, people get promoted for results even if they destroy relationships. Ab e is a price to pay for high performance. In healthy cultures, no level of individual excellence justifies undermining people. You're not a high performer if you don't elevate others."― Adam Grant

  • Sarah is destroying relationships and undermining the team, full stop. It doesn't matter if she feels she's direct or that others are too sensitive - if you don't reign her in and demand sustained change, you will be prioritizing short term results over long-term impact and abdicating a massive responsibility you have as a manager.

  • Adventurous_Ad6799 I have so many questions. What did she say that made two people cry? Are they generally very sensitive? I work with someone who cries almost daily so if someone makes them cry it's not even a blip on the radar to be honest. If everyone on the team equally as upset with her or is it the same 1-2 people? It's probably one of them who submitted the anonymous complaint.

  • Sad girl crying at her laptop

    Sensitive employee cries after her coworker gives her a piece of her mind.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • How direct have you been with her when you've approached this issue? If you haven't already, give her a taste of her own medicine. Not to be unnecessarily ride, but to communicate in a way that she prefers. "You're unkind and it makes this an unpleasant place to work. I need you to reel it in and treat people with more respect because, right now, your numbers are the only thing keeping you afloat here." Tell her to stop interrupting during meetings. If she does it, kick her out in front of every

  • ander594 You have a Tiger in a Zoo. If she's bored or doesn't want to do something, somebody is going to get bit. High performers need constant enrichment, challenges. She also doesn't get to do any of that if she continues to be a brat. Level with her.

  • mel34760 Your team's productivity improvement will far outpace anything she is doing, once you get rid of the problem child.

  • jrm 70210 If you want a toxic work environment, keep her. You have 7 people and I can imagine you're only getting 75% from others because of her. What if everyone else became better because she is gone.

  • BadFish7763 What's the priority, profit or team morale? That's a rhetorical question. BTW, if you can't fire her, you're not the boss. She is.

  • Reddit_Ninja33 When a company values a single employees work over the work environment of others, it's a bad company or poor management.There is no more discussion Sarah. Do better or it's time to go. She is an adult and should be able to comprehend that.

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