Parents demand nanny begin no-diaper potty training with 18-month-old who spends 10 hours a day in her home: 'They're adamant it'll take 3 days'

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    A female toddler holding a stuffed toy looks up at a caregiver offering her a doll

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • A nanny was faced with a dilemma relating to the toddler that she took care of in her own home five days a week. Her parents wanted to start potty training her, and were insistent on trying a method that involved her not wearing a diaper for several days straight.

    The nanny had reservations about this, as she did not want her making a mess in her own house, and was skeptical that it would only take three days, as the parents were telling her. She was unable to care for the child at home, and she wondered whether she could refuse to help them with this.

  • Can I refuse to participate in the potty-training plan for the toddler I'm a nanny to?

    First of all, I absolutely adore the family I work as a nanny for, so I really want advice on how to handle this amicably.

  • I (24f) am a full-time nanny to an 18 month old, who's an only child. She spends about 9-10 hours/day, 5 days/week at my apartment. We've been getting ready to potty train her, and her parents just announced they want to do the "3 Day No Pants"

  • method. The idea is that you let the toddler go diaper-free and give them constant access to the training toilet, and in three days they'll be potty trained. I have my doubts, not so much with the effectiveness of the method but with the timeline. They're adamant that it'll take exactly three days,

  • A female toddler leans on a couch while raising a hand to her face

    A female toddler leans on a couch while raising a hand to her face

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • because that's what they've read. The problem is they want her to do the potty training at my apartment. I'm really not a fan of a diaper-less 18- month-old running around my home. I don't want to have to constantly hover over her to make sure she doesn't relieve herself all over my carpeting,

  • even if it does really only take three days. I told the parents I'm really not comfortable with doing that, and was told that it's their child so they'll decide how she gets potty-trained. They don't often get three consecutive days off, so they say I'll have to do it. Watching her at their house isn't an option, as they

  • have a fairly aggressive dog and I have PTSD from an attack when I was young. Boarding the dog isn't an option, because it doesn't get along with other dogs. They also say taking time off work is impossible right now. We've never butted heads like this before, so I'm not sure if I'm the one being unreasonable.

  • A caregiver adjusts the clothing of a female toddler with a pacifier as she leans against the couch

    A caregiver adjusts the clothing of a female toddler with a pacifier as she leans against the couch

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • bananab55 We attempted this method to no avail with my toddler. It is bizarre they want to do this in your home.

  • If they sent the kid to daycare, would they expect the daycare teachers to let her be diaper free in the classroom? If they want this method, they can do it on a 3 day weekend like every other family thats tried it. before.

  • iamverypowerful Under no circumstances do you have to consent to a diaperless baby in your home for 3 days. They can wait until the end of May and do it Memorial Day weekend or allow you to use a different method in your home. This is crazy of them!!

  • mothermonarch If it was in their home I'd feel differently but in yours? Absolutely no way. You're not unreasonable to say no to this plan

  • cats_r_gr8t That's hilarious they think it's going to take days. I read that book as well. It depends on the kids but potty training is a process and kids need time to learn.

  • They are right, it is their kid. They can absolutely decide how they want to potty train. And it's your home, and you don't need to let a toddler pee all over your house. You make the rules for your home. They won't board their aggressive dog, they won't take off time? That's their problem.

  • Limp-Story-9844 Tell parent to take one week off, and parent potty trains. Step away from this expectation.

  • LetterheadNo4396 They can do that over the weekend at their own house and take a day off work since they are so confident it will only take 3. If they don't have the days off sounds like they are reading about a style of parenting that isn't for their family and they need a wake up call.

  • Estilady Is she even showing signs she is developmentally ready?

  • Smurphy115 Absolutely absurd they are asking this. This is really sounding like they just don't want to put any effort into potty training and push it all on you. No. They can find a long weekend to do it or you can attempt another method.

  • Do some research and suggest another method. (ON THE CLOCK) If they continue to dig their heels in. Get a quote from a carpet/upholstery cleaner for EVERYTHING IN YOUR APT and say you'll do it for that additional fee which I would demand you get before you attempt it.

  • BubbleCrum I did something similar in potty training my own children and I just want to let you know I would NEVER assume anyone else would be comfortable with it in their homes. That is not acceptable. Theyre right in that they can choose how to potty train their kid- and then THEY can potty train their kid.

  • C8H10N402_snob They can take a week's vacation and hire a crime scene cleaner to de-funk the bodily wastes of an their 11/2-year-old.

  • jesgolightly If it only takes 3 days, then they should take a Friday off and drop their fully trained child off at your apartment on Monday morning - unless weekends dont count as days...

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