Family hangout goes south when older sister tries to make her brother the ‘peacemaker’ for their parents: ‘"I'm coming to eat and talk, not play mediator"’

The “family referee” is a great way to phrase this man's emotional job. He's tasked with being his parents' couples therapist, and as weird as that is, it's more so unfitting and damaging to him. When a child assumes the role their parents should be in, that means there's a foundational dysfunction in the family hierarchy. The mother and father no longer have the final say, and they fall into the role of reprimandee rather than the one who reprimands.

How is this possible? Well, when two emotionally immature adults decide that family dinner is the perfect time to get angry at each other and make their adult children uncomfortable, things sort of fall into place, as they do.