Brother demands half of sister's inherited land after selling his own share for a failed business, but she refuses: ‘I shouldn’t have to lose my inheritance because of his decision’

4 months ago 50

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  • Pensive young woman with long braids resting her hand on her cheek while sitting outdoors on a quiet wooded path.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • AITAH for refusing to give my brother half my inherited land after he sold his share against everyone’s advice?

    1 (32F) was born and raised in the slams of kibera in kenya. With nothing much but I had most of the basic needs.

  • My granddad had a 32 acres piece of land that he divided between me and my two brothers (his grand children) I don't know why but this was his will.

  • I our mom told us to take care of him so i think this triggered him.

  • Even when he got dementia he could only remember our names. before he passed away three years ago.

  • My older brother got the biggest portion since he's the firstborn, and my younger brother and I got smaller pieces.

  • At the time everyone agreed with the arrangement and there was no conflict. Even from his children.

  • Thoughtful young woman with braided hair sitting by a window, resting her head on her hand while gazing off to the side.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The problem started last year when my younger brother decided to sell his land. He said he wanted to start a business in town.

  • The entrepreneurial sibling with a business plan and zero brakes swoops in just in time to make everything difficult. He sells his share anyway despite every aunt uncle and passing neighbor screaming land is the one thing you do not sell. The price is low the business is high risk and the universe does its thing. Money gone. Land gone. Business unresponsive on arrival.

  • My mum, my older brother, and even some relatives told him not to sell it because land is something you can never replace once it's gone.

  • He didn't listen. He had this promising business idea. He sold it anyway for what I personally think was a very low price.

  • The business he started failed within a few months and now the money is gone. Recently he came to me and asked if I could give him half of my land so he could build a house.

  • After burning his inheritance like kindling he circles back and decides the solution lives on his sister’s side of the fence. Suddenly half of her land is rebranded as the compassionate choice. The sales pitch is wrapped in family language. Siblings support each other. She does not need that much land. He needs a fresh start. Everyone agrees the land should stay in the family. Conveniently the definition of family seems to end where his consequences begin.

  • Young woman with braided hair looking upward outdoors, standing in front of blurred green trees in a park setting.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I told him I felt bad about his situation, but I didn't think it was fair because he already had land and chose to sell it.

  • He got really upset and said I'm being selfish and that siblings are supposed to support each other.

  • Now my mum has started pressuring me, saying that since I'm not married yet I "don't need that much land anyway" and that my brother needs it more.

  • Some relatives are also saying family land should stay within the family and that I should help him because he made a mistake.

  • But the thing is, I've been planning to build a house and start farming on that land in the next couple of years.

  • If I give him half of it, those plans are basically ruined. My older brother told me privately that I shouldn't give up any land because it won't stop there and I'll end up losing more.

  • Now family gatherings are awkward and my mum keeps hinting that I should reconsider because my brother is struggling.

  • The mother angle makes it even messier. She joins the pressure campaign with the classic unmarried daughter logic. Since the daughter has no husband yet the land is somehow in a holding pattern waiting for someone else’s name. Meanwhile the daughter actually has a plan. A house. Farming. A future that is rooted in soil she did not barter away for a short term dream.

  • The older brother quietly says the obvious thing. Give up half and the requests will not stop there. Once one boundary is moved every future crisis will come with a map and a measuring tape

  • He is currently living with my mom in the same house. Part of me feels guilty because he's my sibling and he genuinely has nowhere to build now or bounce back.

  • But another part of me feels like I shouldn't have to lose my inheritance because of his decision.

  • What looks like a moral dilemma is basically a recycling request. One sibling already turned generational land into pocket money. Now that same choice is being pitched as a group effort so no one has to call it what it is a very expensive lesson with excellent soil.

  • AITAH for refusing to give him half of my land?

  • duehickey NTA He had the same amount of land as you and decided to sell it, how is it fair on yourself or your other brother if he takes half of your share. He should own up to the fact that he made a bad decision and sort it out himself.

  • Kilonzo_P Original Poster's Reply This is what my big brother told me.... But again my mom has nothing to give him it's just me and my other brother

  • duehickey If he really wants the land he can work hard and try and repurchase the land he sold beforehand, it was his decision to do so and it's unfair on you for him to try and take your share because he sold his.

  • Kilonzo_P Original Poster's Reply We tried to repurchase but holly Chrt the person wants triple the amount. Market price

  • Fearless-Speech-1131 As an African, I'm familiar with this sh. Our families have this nasty habit of coddling male kids and manipulating females into mothering them with self sacrifice. Do not do it.

  • Kilonzo_P Original Poster's Reply I heard you. I will fight for what is mine

  • ploud1 NTA He successfully completed the 'f... around' phase. Now it's time he finds out.

  • Kilonzo_P Original Poster's Reply Exactly my brother's words... The older one

  • No_Wishbone_4829 Why has he not asked older brother for some of his

  • Kilonzo_P Original Poster's Reply They assume i will get married and leave the land.

  • ChaosCoordinator42 NTA. If his business had been wildly successful, would he have shared a large portion of the profits with you? According to him, siblings should support each other. You know he wouldn't have shared the profits. So he doesn't get a share of your inheritance.

  • Kilonzo_P Original Poster's Reply I had not think about this at all... He didn't even share the money he got from selling the land... This is absolutely true thanks

  • Tal_Tos_72 Cop on to yourself. Seriously cop on and stop letting him and others walk all over you. Look at it this way, if you also sold your land and it failed. Who in their right mind would then just give you half THEIR property? Would you really expect your older brother to say to you "here you can now have the downstairs of my house because you are my brother"??? NO Just next time anyone asks. Just say "NO" and do NOT get into any discussions on it, don't elaborate, don't justify. Just shut

  • Kilonzo_P Original Poster's Reply Thanks. I have just remembered 'no' is a complete sentence

  • Is __ It ___ Clean __ Yet There you go, OP, there's a fellow African, who (I assume!) understands a h I of a lot more than a lot of us on this thread do, telling you to NOT to "help" your brother. Is there a lawyer or someone that helps with these kinds of disputes? Like, can you find a way, legally, to keep your brother from contacting you, or a way you can leave your land to your (much wiser!) older brother if something happens to you? I'm being honest here..... is it common in these situation

  • Kilonzo_P Original Poster's Reply Thank you so much. I will look into this.

  • TheNorthC Let's turn this around. If YOU had sold your land and lost everything, would your brother give you half of his? Would your mother be pressuring your brother to give you his land?

  • Kilonzo_P Original Poster's Reply Tbh... NO... I was not even involved when they were selling his piece... Like in Kenya if you sell a land you need atleast 3 witnesses and a community leader... I heard about it from my elder bro. If I did this and came back they'd tell me "usijali utapata kwako" translate to don't worry you'll get married soon. Sharing their land would not be on the table at all.

  •  And the audacity of it all, you must protect yourself at all times. Even from family

  • Kilonzo_P Original Poster's Reply Being a woman right! But I will fight for my piece

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