3 older siblings tell 16-year-old brother that he's the reason they grew up in poverty: 'They told me if I had never been born, everyone's lives would be so much better, and it's not our parents' fault.'

6 months ago 54

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He didn't ask to be born, and yet he's to blame for his siblings' problems instead of the people who had more children than they could feed.

People look for scapegoats to deal with the uncomfortable feelings associated with their own shortcomings. Placing all negative emotions related to a scapegoat helps people maintain a sense of control in situations where they are vulnerable, while also fostering social cohesion within a group. If a pastor has been behaving badly, church leaders are more likely to scapegoat the person who exposed his behavior, because his removal as the church's leader destabilizes the community they've worked so hard to build and maintain. It doesn't matter whether the accuser is right or wrong. Maintaining control of power and an upstanding reputation is the priority. 

Blaming parents for their shortcomings can significantly destabilize the family unit. It's a lot easier to scapegoat a child for being "the bad seed" than to hold a parent accountable for either their bad parenting or insufficient family planning. Significantly older siblings might scapegoat their younger sibling for taking their parents' attention away from them, rather than blaming their parents for not paying enough attention to them. The youngest sibling didn't ask to be born. They were just an infant and a toddler, and had greater needs from their parents than kids who can feed and dress themselves. But if a group of people decides that you're to blame for all of their life's problems, it is incredibly difficult to convince them otherwise. 

Despite self-reporting, a great deal of the population loves to feel like victims and embrace their victimhood at every opportunity. They want everyone to feel bad for them and affirm that they are right about everything, and everyone else is a jealous hater who hates to see them win. If someone who loves to be a victim finds a scapegoat, they will do anything and everything to protect their ego and make sure everyone sees the scapegoat as the villain they believe them to be.

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